Days Like This

I wish I didnt have them. Not neccessarily the DAY. Because they day was great, I wish the feelings would go away.

I used to tell myself that being by myself would be easier, because I couldn't get hurt that way. But i don't know who I was trying to kid.

I'm trying to be okay. I don't want you to see me broken. I don't want anyone to see me broken. I just. I don't know what to do. I don't know who to be, for anyone. I can glue this smile on my face for the world to see, but when no ones looking... I feel like this.

I feel. Alone. And that's so stupid because I know I'm not. I have more people in my life than I have ever had, but I feel like i'm losing you. Even though you're asleep in my room.

I can't talk to you anymore. Because I know it bothers you when I talk to you, especially about her. I'm sorry that I like her so much, and I can't like you.

I wish things were different. I wish I wasn't different. I wish I didn't care so much about people who don't even give a fuck about me. I'm sorry. To you, and to me.

I don't like having emotions. I don't like liking you so much when I know i'm just chasing pavements.

I just want to be numb again. I want all of this to go away. I just want my friends back. Because no matter how we try to play this, the two of you aren't my friends anymore. I wish I didn't know so much.

I wish that wishes came true...