Lisa,
It has taken me so long to respond to you because at the time I received your message about my sexual orientation, I couldn't find a way to say anything to you without being disrespectful, or impolite. I apologize in advance if anything in this message offends you. And I hope you understand that this will more than likely be the last time I ever contact, or speak to you in any matter.
I appreciate your concern about my "well-being" Lisa, but how dare you come into my life and snoop through my facebook page to either confirm or deny a certain inquiry of yours, that in all honesty is absolutely none of your business.I quit attending The Church of Christ for personal reasons, that I feel I should not have to share with you, or anyone else who attends that church for that matter. I departed from the congregation because I simply felt uncomfortable there. Even though your so-called family is supposed to love each other unconditionally. Right?
Well you can lecture me, and give me quotes from the bible all you want, I promise you, I have heard it al before. I have heard worse and felt worse than anything you could possibly imagine.
In the bible Lisa, Homosexuality is reffered to as an abomination, and the word 'Abomination' Is only ever used to express a ritual wrong, it is never used in accordance with something innately immoral.
"Thou Shalt Not Lie With Mankind, As WIth Womankind: It Is An Abomination" (Leviticus 18:22, KJV)
With all due respect Lisa, and I really do mean that, I never asked you to accept me. I never asked you to understand. "Woundedness, and Brokenness" As you put it, did not confuse me, no-one and nothing turned me this way.
I accepted your friend request, as well as Ray's, under the impresion private matters would stay private. And that we could act like adults. I do not particularly care about the choices you have made for you life. You have a life with your husband, you are happy, you love him.
So again, How Dare You, try to deny me of that same thing. My fiance and I have been called things, and been looked at in ways that can cause people to want to end their own lives Lisa. To commit the ultimate, unforgivable sin. I am in love with someone, and I do not care in the slightest, if you or anyone else approves. I have my family and no matter what you say, God loves me. No matter how disgusted you are in my so-called "Lifestyle Choice" This is who I am. I am attracted to females. I always have been, ever since the day you met me. Don't worry being gay is not contagious, so you dont have to wash your hands. My only hope for you Lisa, is that in the future, you open your eyes, and take a step into the 21st century. "The Gays" are everywhere. And all we want is for people like you, to stop with your judgements, and your looks, and your pathetic names for us.
We have struggles greater than you will ever know, and if this sin is a choice like you seem to believe it is, Why wouldn't we choose the easy way out? The life where we wouln't get ridiculed for simply loving someone. I have been bullied since I was in grade school because I was different. I have a scar on my forehead because a boy who thought I was weird threw a rock at me at the bus stop, although it did not require stitches, it wasn't just my forehead it scarred, Everyday I look in the mirror, I am distinctly reminded that people who don't even know me, hate me, and that no matter what I do, I will always have that reminder that I cannot hide, that to me says "Your different" Did you get rocks thrown at you? Or pushed down in the hallways? How about the name calling? Did you ever go home and look up on the internet the words that kids at school called you because you were to embarassed to ask your family, in case you really were a freak. What if they didn't want to love you anymore because of what the kids at school call you?
How dare you assume you know everything about me, and basically tell me I am going to hell. How dare you sit at that computer and type the words I have heard since I was seven. No matter what you say, or how you say it, you are always saying the same thing. "You're a freak, You're different, You disgust me." I really hope you realize you cannot change me. If I was going to change Lisa, It would've been the day that rock hit me, and the blood was so thick running down my face that I couldn't see,The day I couldn't even ask for help, because I was to embarrassed, because I Was A Freak.
If the way I live my life, makes you sick, consider the way you live yours makes me feel. Hear the names they called me, cry yourself to sleep, hide it from everyone, even your parents. Why don't you walk in my shoes for a while. And then tell me the things I've heard before. You try being me. You wouldn't last a day.
Again, I mean no disrespect, and your concern is appreciated to an extent, and this will be the last time you hear from me.
I am going to leave you with a few names I invite you to google, to see what people like you, do to people like me.
Charles Howard, Harvey Milk, Tyler Clementi,Seth Walsh, Asher Brown, Billy Lucas, Cody Barker, and many countless others. These are a few of the people who hve either lost their lives, or taken their own, because of People Like You. You may not have caused anyone to kill themselves, but your actions are disgusting to me.
Goodbye Lisa, Please do not contact me, or my family on this matter. I have said all that I will ever have to say to you.
